Life has a way of teaching, usually the hard way.
You think you have time. You think you have it figured out. And then one day, it hits you that the real lessons were right in front of you the whole time.
If you’re lucky, someone points them out before you learn them through pain.
Today, that’s what we hope to do.
Here are seven truths most men only learn too late.
1. Emotional intelligence isn’t optional
Ever said something in anger you instantly regretted?
Ever watched a relationship fall apart because you didn’t know how to manage emotions — yours or theirs?
You’re not alone.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand, manage, and influence emotions. It’s a skill many underestimate until the damage is done.
According to therapist Dr. Jeanne Segal, emotional intelligence is “the secret to lasting intimate relationships.”
It also affect your career prospects. Studies show that those with higher EQ earn nearly $30,000 more annually than those who lack it.
And yet, many men don’t work on it until they’ve lived through the cost of not having it — broken relationships, missed promotions, regrets they can’t fix.
2. Value relationships
We see different ads daily. either selling watches, cars, smartphones etc…and we are busy acquiring the next fancy stuff to make ourselves happy.
Young men today are bombarded with 4,000 to 10,000 ads a day, selling the idea that things equal success.
We chase the next big thing, working longer hours, sacrificing weekends, missing milestones with people who matter, all for material possessions.
But research from Harvard’s 80-year happiness study says it straight:
“Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.”
Many realise too late that it’s not the things, it’s the people, that truly make life rich.
3. Health is wealth (and it’s a debt that comes due)
When you’re young, you feel invincible.
Junks at midnight? Fine.
Three hours of sleep? Whatever.
Skipping workouts for weeks? Who cares?
Until one day, you do care. Because it catches up.
For some, it hits in their late twenties. For you, it could be sooner or later. But make no mistake, it’s coming.
As Dr. Thomas Rutledge (a Psychiatry professor at UC San Diego) says,
“Health investments yield incredible returns in the form of function, experiences, memories, relationships, and quality of life.”
You won’t always bounce back like you do now.
Invest early. Eat well, move daily, get sleep, check your health.
Your future self is depending on you.
DON’T MISS THIS: Why you always fail, and how to fix it
4. The power to say “no”
We hustle to please.
To climb.
To “earn it.”
And so many of us spend our best years living everyone else’s plan for us.
The problem is that the dream life we think we’re sacrificing for often never comes.
Learning to say “no” — even when it disappoints others — is critical.
Boundaries aren’t selfish; they are survival.
In Psychotherapist Amy Morin‘s words:
“Creating healthy emotional and physical boundaries gives mentally strong people the room they need to grow.”
You don’t owe everyone access to your energy, your time, or your peace.
Say no. Own it. Build your life, not the life others expect of you.
5. Money matters (but not how you think)
As much as we talked about valuing relationships over material stuff earlier, we’re saying you should ignore money. That’s a mistake too.
Financial literacy, understanding how money works, is power.
The earlier you start, the bigger the advantage.
Let’s say you invest just ₦100,000/month starting at 20 years old. We’d assume that your rate of return is 7% before inflation. If we use the compounding interest formula for monthly contributions; by age 60, you could have about ₦613.45 million.
Time multiplies your money more than hustle ever can.
Understand saving.
Understand investing.
Respect compound interest.
Your 60-year-old self will thank you.
6. Never stop learning
School was just the beginning.
The most successful people who are actually living lives of impact and freedom never stopped learning.
Bill Gates reads 50 books a year.
Oprah Winfrey never stops taking courses and hiring coaches.
In today’s fast-changing world, industries evolve almost overnight.
And according to the World Economic Forum’s Future of Jobs Report, “Curiosity and lifelong learning” rank among the top five critical career skills.
Stay hungry. Stay curious. Stay growing.
7. Time is everything
Money comes and goes.
Things break.
Relationships evolve.
But time?
Time only moves in one direction — and you never get it back.
It’s so easy to waste it:
scrolling, doubting, overthinking, delaying.
But the truth is, now is all any of us ever really have.
Prioritise what matters.
Focus on building memories, skills, health, love, and not just chasing “someday.”
One day, you’ll look back.
Make sure you’re proud of how you spent your time.
Finally!
Life teaches. But it doesn’t wait.
If you’re reading this now, you have a chance to be one of the rare few who learn early instead of regret late.
Recognise these truths.
Act on them.
Live wiser, sooner.
As always, we hope you found something here that helps you build the life you deserve.
